Cinta

1. Andai kata cinta itu sebuah pengorbanan, mengapa pengorbanan itu bukan nokhtah sebuah cinta? Andai kata derita itu harga sebuah cinta, mengapa cinta itu semakin sukar dimiliki? Cinta seumpama kota kristal indah di penglihatan derita di perasaan.

2. Ada orang pada mulanya malu untuk jatuh cinta tapi bila perasaan menjadi rindu padanya, tiba-tiba perasaan malu itu menjadi hilang dengan sendirinya dan terpaksa menerima kenyataan yang sebenarnya bahawa anda telah jatuh cinta.

3. Gerak geri memberi pengertian kepada perasaan yang tidak terucap oleh kata-kata.

4. Cinta yang di semadikan tidak mungkin layu selagi adanya imbas kembali. Hati yang remuk kembali kukuh selagi ketenangan di kecapi. Jiwa yang pasrah bertukar haluan selagi esok masih ada. Parut yang lama pastikan sembuh selagi iman terselit di dada.

5. Cinta yang datang umpama pelangi ceria dengan 7 warna memukau saat bayu berlagu riang, tika itulah cintanya hadir. Apabila mata terlihat seseorg yang bakal mewarnai hidupnya.

6. Cinta bukan paksaan. Ia lahir dari dua perasaan, kehadirannya tidak diundang, perginya tiada yang merelakan kerana ia terlalu sukar untuk dimengertikan.

7. Persahabatan biasanya berakhir dengan percintaan tetapi percintaan tidak pernah berakhir dengan persahabatan.

8. Cinta bukan mengajar kita lemah tetapi membangkitkan kekuatan. Cinta bukan mengajar menghinakan diri tetapi menghembuskan kegagahan. Cintabukan melemahkan semangat tetapi membangkitkan semangat.

9. Apakah sebenarnya cinta itu? Cuba katakan. Tak lain tak bukan ialah dua jiwa dlm satu fikiran dan dua hati dlm satu debaran.

10. Cetusan cinta pertama merupakan suatu getaran yg sangat menggoncangkan jiwa.

11. Kadangkala kita menyedari betapa dalamnya kita menyintai seseorang, disaat kita sedang kehilangannya. Dan kadangkala kita juga menyedari betapa perlunya cinta seseorg terhadap kita, disaat kita amat memerlukannya.

12. Cinta yang lahir dari pandang pertama adalah cinta suci, manakala perasaan cinta yang lahir dr kemesraan persahabatan adalah cinta sejati. Namun sukar untuk membezakan yg mana lebih abadi, cinta suci atau cinta sejati.

Apa itu cinta?

PERCINTAAN bukan pasti berakhir dengan perkahwinan, malah ada pasangan yang bercinta bagai Laila dan Majnun tetapi akhirnya putus di pertengahan jalan.

Justeru, apabila mengingatkan kisah percintaan lama, pasti ramai di antara kita yang tersenyum sendiri. Bagi lelaki dan wanita, kita tentu mempunyai kisah percintaan sendiri yang kadangkala jika ditulis boleh dibuat novel.

Ada yang kecewa akibat bercinta mengambil keputusan terus membujang sehingga tua, seolah-olah cinta pertama itu terlalu agung dan tidak boleh diganti dengan percintaan lain.

Namun, bagi kebanyakan kita, jodoh pertemuan ketentuan Ilahi. Justeru, apabila gagal dalam percintaan pertama, kedua dan seterusnya, masih ada ruang untuk mengubat kedukaan itu.

Apabila menjadi suami isteri, kadangkala teringat juga kisah percintaan lama. Ada di antara kita yang berani untuk memberitahu pasangannya mengenai cerita cinta yang pernah ditempuhi dan bagi yang lain menyimpan dalam memori sendiri.

Setiap orang pasti memiliki kisah masa lalu, sama ada buruk atau indah. Timbul persoalan, adakah kisah masa lalu yang buruk itu perlu diceritakan kepada kekasih kita?

Adakah jika diceritakan akan membuktikan betapa dalamnya cinta anda dan pasangan? Atau adakah dengan membuka cerita cinta lama itu akan merosak dan memporak-porandakan hubungan anda?

Ada yang berkata, jika anda tidak menyampaikan kisah cinta masa lalu, maka anda akan menjadi seorang pembohong di hadapan orang yang anda cintai dan anda tidak mungkin dapat mencintainya sepenuh hati.

Ini berlaku terutama kepada pasangan yang berkomitmen untuk bersama-sama selamanya, justeru setiap orang berhak mengetahui kisah pasangan yang dicintainya itu.

Namun, sebelum anda ingin menceritakan kisah percintaan masa lalu, pastikan pasangan anda bersedia menerima segala masa lalu anda dan melupakannya!

Beberapa hal yang perlu diperhatikan untuk menyingkap masa lalu:

• Bagaimana keadaan anda ketika melalui saat-saat percintaan dengan bekas kekasih anda.
• Kehidupan sekarang lebih baik daripada masa lalu.
• Cerita percintaan masa lalu itu akan meningkatkan kualiti cinta anda.
• Ceritakan percintaan masa lalu yang boleh memberi manfaat kepada kehidupan anda dan pasangan ketika ini.
• Jalani hubungan anda dan pasangan dengan saling menanamkan kepercayaan dalam hubungan cinta.
• Tanamkan dalam diri hubungan ketika ini amat penting, justeru anda jujur untuk menceritakan kisah percintaan masa lalu.

The end of a beginning

I got this phrase from my memory, not from some "famous quotes" engine or a newspaper article. The memory, in turn, was plucked from a discovery channel special about 2 years ago depicting the lives of patriotic army men who fought for their country during peak of World War 2.

It was a time where the once mighty powers of europe were in the Nazi’s hands and the only remaining hope rested on the shoulders of Great Britain. It was believed that the bloody battle which took place in the airspace of the island was the sort of battle that determined the final outcome of the war. It was crunch time for the RAF. But, as history spectacularly put it, Great Britain and the fight for free will prevailed. Then, sometime in 1942, he famously said: "This is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning".

Everything has its ending. But do we really know when the end would ultimately befall upon us? You have my assurance that I don’t. I used to think that if I tried my best to savour a wonderful moment, it would somehow be remembered by me for the rest of time. I was wrong. I found out that the more you try to make a moment "live forever", the faster it evaporates inside your head and floats out your ears. Instead, the little things you do tend to sneak its way into the permanent memory. For instance, even if I try to summon a particular memory from a trip i enjoyed, it was merely a vague, blurred-out snippet. Minor events such as getting stuck at a mickey shop’s stairway with my cousins during a big storm while waiting for my dad to rescue us, cycling through the busy roads with my cousins back in my dad’s hometown, etc… These are the ones that i can recall vividly. The time, the details, the people… all blended together and tucked into a corner inside my head. It’s weird, how these things happen. Yeah, that’s why truth is definitely weirder than fiction.
As much as I want to dwell on them, I have a present life to live. A life that would carve the way for my future life.
We must move on. That’s the way things work around here.

I have to say that blogging had its moments, but the time has come for me to look for greener pastures across the river to give me more leeway in some sense. Tones of assignments,presentations,final exam,role play are still pending.**my superhero please rescue me again**

Like I said, it is just the end of the beginning.

you know when....

You know those days when you wake up in the morning after 8 hrs of sleep and feel extremely tired? Yeah …today is one of those days… I got up , went through the usual routine, woke up with a headache.. i wonder whats wrong with me. Could it be that i’m getting the jittery pre-performance feeling 24 hours before the actual thing?? or is it just a normal case of paranoia? don’t know, don’t care…

Despite sounding crappy and sombre in most of my posts, I hope you don’t get me wrong. I’m not the sad recluse who shuns every living person . Its just that I usually end up venting my anger on ppl, myself, on the whole society in some cases in blog posts.And it just so happens that I have a blog to dump those things. Honestly, I’m quite satisfied with what I have. Yes, I am. Did I mention quite ? silly me… mayb a little change here and there would be nice.. . Okok.. I better shut up.Have an enjoyable weekend ....and not to forget....

SELAMAT HARI RAYA ...MAAF ZAHIR & BATIN.

night....

Time

Recently, i realised that when you grow older, and you understand the world more(or u think you do), time seem to pass faster. e.g. When you are in primary school, everything passes so darn slow and you are constantly looking forward to the end-o-the-year holidays.Then ,you enter secondary school…form 1 was a blast ! form 2 was even better >hope it lasted longer though…form 3 :what happened then ar? only clear memory is of the day i got my 1st hp and the PMR exam. Form 4 >just seems like yesterday that teachers are sorting us into our classes.. form 5 :whoa…hit the breaks! Time’s rolling by too fast! … got the picture?..and now we're all in uni/coll life....really fast..too fast...

So , life is all about catching up with that phenomenon we call "time". Is time actually a "thing" we can refer to as an object ? Or is it just a way of us keeping track of our lives. Imagine a world without "time" .Come to think of it , it seems highly impossible cus people’s sentence will hang halfway through..like: "hey dude!How was your party during er…. " . Everyone will be wondering how old they are.Lol.Well, its just a thought. It really doesn’t make sense though, cause people are bound to invent "time" …It just depends on what they name it. Maybe in another dimension, people call it " toim".Haha..

Dream

Sometimes, it seems more like a dream than a genuine fragment from my memory when I recall these mini adventures. The way they begin abruptly and stop similarly so does not help with my recollections either... but all’s well. I’m assured that they ARE true albeit only by faith and a subtle sense of guidance from my instinct.

But hey, some sacrifices in the form of comfort and familiarity have to be made in order to pursue your dream. A dream is not merely our mind’s wistful display of work, but the most powerful non-physical force one may ever possess (besides that telepathic superpower which has yet to be discovered of course :P).

Dreams are meant to be pursued, just as rules are meant to be broken. Likewise, clauses do apply for the former as it does for the latter. Come on, no one goes around breaking rules when it makes sense not to; similarly, a dream, it cannot be idiotic. (E.g. building a gamma ray gun to kill your neighbour’s dog for disturbing your beauty sleep). I mean, it can even be illogical, such as building a time machine.. or even constructing an alien tracking device. Fact is, there’s a very fine line between dreams and indulgences in daydreams ala fantasies.

--elaine out--

Hypocrite

1. a person who pretends to have virtues, moral or religious beliefs, principles, etc., that he or she does not actually possess, esp. a person whose actions belie stated beliefs.
2. a person who feigns some desirable or publicly approved attitude, esp. one whose private life, opinions, or statements belie his or her public statements.

Hypocrisy (or the state of being a hypocrite) is the act of preaching a certain belief or way of life, but not, in fact, holding these same virtues oneself. For example, a teacher telling students they should not plagiarize, while secretly being a plagiarist himself. Hypocrisy is frequently invoked as an accusation in many contexts.

Happy Birthday Tony

Last friday was Tony bday.After class we went to 1u for a small celebration for him.He treat 4 of us me,Clement,Wang Ge and Anand ate Bak Kut Teh at there.Here the picture.

Sorry for the late update.Again,HAPPY BIRTHDAY TONY.

For everything that it's worth, why isn't it worth doing?

Then again, all that's hidden beneath the canopy might not be as complicated as it seems. There's no reason to blame society in general as you can only point the finger at yourself for being an idiot.

I need to jump off a cliff that has some extra safety cushion at the bottom so the people who jump wouldn't die. Better still, throw away the cliff and its fall-breaker. Despite the fact that the virtual-world setting practically defeats the purpose itself, someone should just invent a virtual cliff especially for temporary psychos like me to jump. (so that the normal part of us won't wake up to blame our psychotic alter-ego)

So while I'm jumping off edges into the bottomless abyss below (all virtual of course), I think it should be for the best that I master the technique of talking to oneself, eat take-outs 24/7 and bury myself in the avalanche of delusion.

I need divine intervention (or equivalent). Heck, I'd settle with an insy wincy epiphany.
Only problem's that epiphanies just don't jump out of thin air simply because you want them to. OHHH NO, you have to go through all that deliberation and even with that, you need a spark to get the train of thoughts rolling.

So what now?
I'll try to figure that out while I continue to swim aimlessly in this murky pool of shit.

Such a long time since my last update.What can i say more? 3 words.

BUSY,LAZY,EXCUSE.

Since college started my weekends were gone.*tsk tsk* Ok...ok...ok...Elaine....Enough enough enough for complaining all this.Fine!! I will wake up early and jump off from my comfort zone then so that i will got back my weekends again.**hope i can do it**

Nothing much happening last weekends.As usual,worked at starbucks,tuition for Wee Sam and went gym.Worked out at Fitness First Uptown and IOI Mall,but somehow i still prefer Summit.Yea,maybe that's my home gym but on second choice i will go for IOI Mall.The environment and atmosphere there just simply make me feel comfortable whereas FF uptown i felt it's small compare to the both.Anyway FF uptown is near my college so i will work out there when i got long break in between my class.So,spot me there every thursday then.

I shall out and meet with my darling bed now.Night....

Wild thought

Ever had that strange feeling when you're near a fan that is spinning ferociously just inches away from your face? The feeling that comes in tandem with the muffled voice in your head that shouts for you to exemplify stupidity *of the highest order* as Mr R would add. (It just fascinates me that he's so attached to that phrase. I guess every one of us have phrases that we (somtimes unknowingly) "adopt" as our own favourite tagline to brandish whenever an opportunity arises. I find that reasons ranging from "thinking that this would sound cool" to "I just like the sound of it" are usually behind all this tag-line business.)

Another situation that bugs me is that when you're up on a multistory building and there's this balcony at the end. You lean on the balcony and look down. You feel (at least just a bit) intimidated by the height if you lean too much right? Well, I tend to go the extra mile by thinking about the eventualities that would unfold if I just push myself over. Picture the frightening fall... and..
*steps back from the balcony*

Ok...that's enough for all the crap.Hell,tomorrow only 1 hour of class from 8am to 9am.I should be happy but yet it's just waste my petrol for going so far and attend 1 hour of class.Fine fine fine....I know i shouldn't complaint much.

I shall retired to my bed now.Night.

A day in life

wif 2 Xiong Di frm China

me and Nelson

all of us at PICC

Just out from shower.
This is BOOOoooring friday night.
So what to do? I sign into my cobwebbed, fungi-infested friendster and facebook account.

I've given up taking friendster seriously since the day I figured that it's virtually useless but for its birthday reminder. I wonder what took me so long to get it into my head that people who have 100000000.. friends on their list can't possibly be REAL friends with all of them.

Then again, who ARE our so-called "real friends"?
Judging where this is headed, I now know that I've reached the tip of ultimate boredom.
A sensible course of action(COA) >.<. - DIVERT the thoughts.. Channel it to something MORE USEFUL. I'm looking through my facebook account now. xD Amazing, how we are all connected in this small world. Everybody's connected to everyone else. It won't be too surprising if I'm related to some average Joe picked randomly from the streets of KL. He might be my greatgreatgreatgreat grandmother's hairdresser's descendant. Or, he could just be the neighbour dog's physio's son's friend. Which twirls my brain juice... not because of the relationship.. (How many apostrophes are we permitted to use in a sentence?)...ok fine that enough... Today for me was such a hectic day.We have a tour trip to Putrajaya and visit to Sheraton Subang Hotel.Seriously it was boring as i have been to Putrajaya for so many times before during my coach practise for tour guide exam.But our lecturer insists and forced us to go.So have to if not have to pay a fine of RM80.WTF.Fine."Kolej Duit Utama".I am very tired and VERY sick of stuck in the freaking traffic jam AGAIN.Malaysia transportation realy SUCK ALL TIME. Till here then.Nites and say Hi to my dreamland now.

zZzZzzZ.........ZzzZzzZzZ

Changes

Sometimes I get so tired. So tired of pretending that change doesn't matter anymore. Why does it have to?! Every grown man or woman can handle it, why can't I?
When I peer into the window of an ex-classmate's life, I see unknown faces, I see those slots once represented by some of us- even me- replaced by a stranger. Then the wave of melancholy. I cannot be a part of everyone's life. Lamenting about the 'could-be's and 'if's can only pull me deeper into this pit.

So what if I suck at dealing with friends. I lose some, I gain some. Ultimately, I'd HAVE to choose, to prioritize.
Funny,
that the ten year old Elaine was better at handling her friends than the current one.

Just got my timetable and it's SUCK.Next weeks onwards everyday class start at 8am until 5pm DAILY.Well have to adapt to it slowly.Praying hard that i can get some of the subjects exempted.Tomorrow have role play and need to be in college by 8am to meet up my group for rehearsal.Gosh i don't know what going to be like since it's so last minute work.Anyway,time to sleep then.

sweet dream pals.

Monday Blues

Morning worlds.Yea,its Monday today and i know Monday blues.But we still got to continue our life right?So happy working and schooling guys and girls.

Going to class in a short while.

**grab car keys and wallet leave my room now.**

My way

My way... Why is it so hard to do things my way? It should be easy. Easy as pie. It's the worlds simplest form of simplicity. Elementary and abecedarian-ism may need no more euphemism than what I've put forward to follow.Shutup and listen to your own mind before listening to others. Who's running this body anyways? Me or that persistent outsider other than myself.Books can be a nuisance too sometimes. The key is to take that particular type of books with a pinch of salt. You can't just change your view on something after just one book.My stand has to be stronger.

Anyways, I went out to Piramid yesterday with Pearly and Genevieve for lunch and sing-K at Redbox.We have our lunch at Dragon-I and its so freaking expensived and yet the food not realy nice compare to a normal coffee shop.They even charged a packet of wet tissue for RM1.What the hell.Well,nevermind that was my first time there.Nice experienced though.Well after a day at Piramid,i am officialy declared BROKE right now RM100 gone.**heartache**

Class start today i am so excited yet worry.Anyways,its late and have a nice week ahead.

**switch off light and crawling to my bed hugging my pillow**

zzZzzZzzz

Friday Night

To tell ya the truth, I haven't been able to blog my heart out. The zealous, sentimental blogger has disappeared; and now in her place, a quotidian, almost robotic persona who posts just because she has to because she said that she would because she had nothing else to do because she is lazy. I'm not sure if it's even legal to use that many 'because'es in a sentence but If you are observant and just happen to be next to me right now, you can't miss the action in which I'm helplessly clutching at straws, trying to salvage as much of what I used to have. It just isn't right, feeling the knowledge gained and skills honed seep steadily out of my body.

A smart alec would probably say that I should be out there in the battlefield, putting right what I think is out of order instead of sulking and whining about how things are sliding down a spiral towards failure and self-destruction. She would also say that I'm wasting a precious friday night in front of the computer. Before you go on thinking along the same line as my imaginary smart alec- whom I suddenly have the urge to turn into a punching bag- I would like to, in the kindest fashion possible to mankind, halt you from doing so.
Why? Because I'm tired of being reminded that I'm an average in a society where average is almost as bad as below-average and only excellence is celebrated. Plus, there is also the fact that you can't be good at everything. You can love and be good at studies and sports at one point, but obviously, those two don't get along together in a career path prospective. That is why sometimes, it's fine to sit down, look at the bigger picture and whine about the wall of adversities you're facing while sulking at the open windows and doors you sacrificed for another opportunity.

I especially hate and detest that feeling of being left out of something you want to do, but having to give it up because there are options that outweigh it in terms of importance. And when I say "importance", it merely relates to "ensuring a brighter future" which also means "More MONEY". The same "important" tag that doesn't guarantee a happy lifetime ahead is sometimes overused, and thus, becomes the cause of many misjudgements. It is almost as if everything we do now is premised on financial stability and the conjecture that happiness is sure to come along with it. How many people out there can actually say with their heads held high that they chose what they truly love over what is "important"? How many can be good at all the things they love? I know I can't.
Hence, the sulking and whining.

Have a nice weekend, y'al!